*Holds my fingers like Mr. Burns* Excellent *evil laughter*
"The Pagan Man Blog!" Just the name conjures so many images, doesn't it? When I hear it I think about a stereotypical lumberjack with his foot up on a log, in a Captain Morgan pose, holding an axe over his shoulder with one hand and oddly enough a jug of maple syrup in the other. I guess since he is suppose to be Pagan he can have a pentacle, or something. Shouldn't I be thinking of, I don't know, The Green Man, or a Druid, maybe even a Shaman? Well, *takes a deep breath*, SCREW THAT!
*exhales*
Alright, I have been holding that one in for years. Feels good to get it off my chest! Labels....they kinda suck, don't they? Yeah, they do, they totally do. I mean come on, a Pagan man could look like any man....though some women I have met think we should all look like this guy.
I mean come on! How the hell are we suppose to live up to that!? I mean geez, I would have to go on a high protein diet and workout all the freaking time! I mean come on, look at him, with his rugged yet neatly trimmed beard. His hairy yet trimmed chest, his um....perfectly formed chest....wait, what was I saying?
Do a Google Image search and see what you come up with. I loved this one.
Though I can't really look at this without speaking in a high pitch voice and saying, "You shall bring me a shrubbery!"
"The Pagan Man", what the hell is a Pagan man?
Oh! Oh! I know! I know! Pick me! Pick meeeeeeee!
Okay fine, geez, the annoying guy in the front with the rapis....er....coke bottle glasses..
Yes! *coughs* er, um......a Pagan Man, by definition, would be an adult male who belongs to an earth based religion or any religion claiming to be Pagan. This could include Pantheism, Wicca, Druidism,and a whole host of religions. *beams with pride over reciting this fact so well*
Riiiiiight. Well, I suppose that is true. A Pagan man would just be a man, who is in fact, a Pagan. Awesome, well this blog is done, good work everybody!
*shakes hands, tosses confetti, passes out the bonus checks, and opens the champagne while humming "Gonna Party like its 199..*
Hey, wait a minute!
*For some reason a record is scratched as the music stops....that's an odd MP3 player pause feature...*
Yeah?
Well, just because we know that being a Pagan and being a man makes one a male Pagan, does it really explain what it is to be a Pagan man? Does that really explain what a man goes through in the Pagan community? What is expected of a Pagan man by his peers? The milestones one should go through, and all of the other important things that make up the sum of a Pagan man.
*grumbles as he takes back the bonus checks and keeps the bottle for himself*
Alright, alright, back to work you lazy bums....seems we have a blog to write, thanks to the "scholar" in the front row. * mumbles: "I just haaaad to open up the first post in four years to an audience."*
Well, you heard the man. We have more work to do. So sit back, strap in, and grab a beer, this are about to get weird. Because, I am done with trying to be the neat and proper little blog writer everyone says I have to be. It's time to just be a guy and say screw it! Yeah, I'm keeping it PG-13 too.
Well it's 7:20 AM, you know what that means? Mini-Doughnuts and Mt. Dew for breakfast over South Park reruns before I get back to work on the Book of Shadows project. Yeah, that's right I'm cross topicing baby! Trying to keep my online identities separate is hard enough, so here I say screw it!
Huh, I think we alright have a blog saying. How about this for a title: "The Pagan Man Blog; Screw It!"? Too in your face? Too edgy? Nah, it just sucks.
Okay, I'm off to enjoy my mini-doughnuts.
Mini-doughnuts you say?
~sigh~ Come on, let me introduce you to a little something called a sugar and caffeine coma.
Sugar!
Later folks.
May the Gods watch over you all,
Snow Wolf
